25th class
Brad Johnson Engl 81, 25th class
WEDNESDAY – The class will do clocking.
THURSDAY – The class will share reading of paragraphs – show and tell.
IMPORTANT: 4 ½ weeks left for this course.
PAPERS – ROUGH DRAFTS
1. Put bracket around the first two words of every sentence.
2. Put box around “and. Three “ands” or less are probably good for a paper. But if you have “ands” and don’t need them, eliminate them, using ic, f ic. Another idea: remove fanboy and replace it with a period or a semi-colon. Or use “as well as”. Be more concise, and try to use fewer words. The phrase, “as well as”, contains more words, but use it to add more tone, color, etc.
Replace “and” with a time or location word.
*Time (when, while).
*To, with can also be used with persons or verbs. Example: “To Mary, the movie was boring.” Or “To share of your talents is the goal of life.” Or With many classes, the work load is easy.
*Location: where.
*Person: who, whom.
* In place of “and” – use “as well as”.
3. Circle every “to be” verb: is, are, was, were, be, being, been. It is not possible to get rid of all of the “to be” verbs, but use as few as possible.
Examples:
“The kids are walking to school. They are late as usual and get in trouble.”
Bracket “the kids”. Circle “are”. Bracket “they are:”
Change the above sentence using words ending in “ly”.
Examples:
Usually late, the kids walking to school get in trouble.”
Lazily, slowly, the second graders skipped to school being late as usual. (use active verbs, not passive verbs)
Lazily the kids skipped to school getting in trouble as usual.
Examples: The following sentences show how to change passive verbs to more active verbs.
The bus is arriving at 6:00. Change to: The bus arrives at 6:00 A.M.
The work shift is starting at 6:00 A.M. Change to: The work shift starts at 6:00 A.M.
We were discussing the same issue yesterday. Change to: We discussed this issue yesterday.
Remember: In a sentence, answer the question “by whom”.
Examples:
“The team was yelled at.” (by whom)
Bracket “the team”. Circle “was”.
Note: the team wasn’t doing anything, but someone was yelling at them. Who is the actor? By whom was the team yelled at? Who did the action? Most likely, the coach yelled at the team.
“The coach yelled at the team.” The verb “was” is replaced by “yelled”.
Now use variety:
Ly word: Angrily, the coach yelled at the team.
Quickly the kids are walking to school so they won’t be late.
Ed: Angered by the teams performance, the coach yelled at the team.
Ing: Skipping to school, the second graders arrived late.
Use a phrase : Mad as hell, the coach yelled at the team.
Make sure that your writing is clear.
If you need more help, ask Brad. Ask people in the Writing Center or another student.
4. Sentence beginnings: Chapter 21:
Examples
Ly: Slowly, she made her way up the stairs
Ing: Laughing daily with her best friends proved to be healing. Instead of: She laughed with her best friends.
Ed: Exhausted by the long hours of studying, Jaimie finally went to sleep.
To: To live in western Washington, you need to have webbed feet.
To live in western Washington, at this time, is not desirable.
Thursday: Use sentences starting with these words: to, with, ly, ing, ed. Make sure the sentence makes sense.
HW:
1. Have a concise, precise, debatable, opinionated statement (not a fact)
2. Use 6-8 varied sentence beginnings – refer to Chapter 21.
3. Underline these beginning words.
4. Have 3-4 logically placed transitions (italicize these words).
5. Have sentence variety – see Chapter 21.
6. Use coordination and subordination and conjunctive adverbs, p. 365.
7. Use interrupters.
8. Double underline active verbs that have replaced the passive verb constructions: is, are, was, were, be, being, been.
9. Italicize any relative pronouns or subordinating words: who/whom, which, where, when, while, that or the word, “to” that are used in place of “and”.
QUOTE OF THE DAY: “It’s like magic. When you live by yourself, all your annoying habits are gone!” --Merrill Marko
